Spider suffocating me!

[velvet]

I had this dream a few days back, and I never have had a dream were I would feel like something is suffocating me.

I was sitting in this chair, doodling a spider. I put around each side a meaning of what the spider represented. Kind of of like cluster web of the representation. Don't know what the words said, but I can tell I was doing something like that. While doodling I was talking to this particular person, I was explaining that I had killed a big female spider. Instead of me doing the killing for the male spider, I told the person it was their turn to kill the spider. The person kept being persistent and told me I should be the one doing it. I told them no, so they throw the big spider towards my face. The big spider just grabs my face and all I can see is darkness. It feels like it is just squeezing my face and I'm just frozen in fear but at the same time I'm very calm. I yelled my mothers name, not sure why but it is the first thing that comes out of my mouth. I try not to panic, but all the time I yell her name the spider keeps suffocating me. Until I lost unconsciousness of the dream, and I feel very relieve.

I cringe every time I think about not being able to breath. Can anyone tell me what this dream meant? Or at least help me solve it.

[Korpo]

Throwing something in your face - making you confront an issue?

You already dealt with the female spider, but you refuse to deal with the male spider... maybe you do not want to deal with the male aspects of your consciousness as thoroughly as you did with the female ones?

You kind of reject to deal with this aspect, you want someone else to do it, but it gets thrown back to you.

The issue is now "in your face," impossible to evade. You find dealing with to be suffocating, overwhelming. You call out for your mother - either for her comfort, a reaction like a child would do. Or maybe just a sign of your distress. But it is possible this denotes the issue started in your childhood, and your reaction is to call back to your mother as a child would. Doodling might be a hint, too.

You also equate the spiders with certain issues, that's why you wrote them next to them. The spider is established as a purely symbolic thing there, not something else. Not an astral creature or whatever. You identify the spider with a meaning.

So, maybe this issue is unresolved for a long time (since your childhood) and sucking the life out of you (taking your breath away). Breath and life force are connected, breathing and being alive, too. If issues block the flow of life force, your energy lessens and lessens.

So maybe it is a message to start working on the issues you try to evade, specifically to go beyond gender-identity, else you get blocked in terms of life force.

Take care,
Oliver

[Seeuzin]

Interesting...the first thing I thought of when I started reading your post was Freud's interpritation of spider imagery. I normally don't get into Freud much, I like Jung better, but I'll share what I remember.

I can't remember it exactly, but what I do remember is that he saw spiders as symbolizing the "evil phallic mother" (or most of the time it is simply referred to as the "phallic mother.") This one takes some explaining, lol: the evil phallic mother is a dominating or controlling mother figure iirc. The evil stepmother in Cinderella was one example of a phallic mother given in what material I have read. So it's kinda interesting, imo, that you'd cry out to your mother when confronted with a suffocating spider...

I don't know if what I've said is on the mark for you or not, but wanted to throw it out there in case it might be of help.

*edit* I just did a quick Google search to refresh my memory...one site said that when contemplating spider imagery, it's often helpful to confront the spider and "ask it searching questions," and also, to contemplate not necessarily your actual mother, but what your mother (or the concept of a mother) means to you.