Korpo
11th January 2009, 09:09 PM
I had a hard time trying to figure out afterward if this was a dream afterward. Like really, really hard...
I saw a handicapped person approach the door. She was stuck in an electric wheel-chair similar to Stephen Hawking, she seemed to have a similar disabling condition. I told Mishell that I was answering the door. I got my wallet, because I thought this was about a fundraiser or something.
At first my impression of her was negative. But as we started talking that changed. Her appearance was that she was a redhead with middle-long hair, extremely wavy. She was slumped into her chair. She had some control-box or something that was really big, or was it a voice box? Maybe that.
I asked her what she wanted, and it surely was not what I expected. She told me that she was without people taking care of her for a while (I somehow remember that it would be two weeks), and if I would be willing to help her out. Like fill in the position of the person taking care of her, at least part of the time. That got me really confused.
Currently I have quite a lot of real life commitments, so I figured I had no time for this, basically. I was trying to figure out if I could do this without endangering my job or depriving my family life, and part of me did not want to do this at all, fearing the responsibility. I was wondering if I could do this at all.
I asked her why she was even asking me? How did that idea come up? And she told me it was about the way I took care of a loved one in the hospital some months ago (which took place in real life). That somehow stumped me.
I must have agreed in a way that I do not fully remember, I must have basically thought I could make room for two days. I did not want to let her go empty-handed, but in the dream I was still trying to weigh that against my real-life situation.
Now the thing happened that made clear that this was a dream. She rose out of her wheelchair and walked into the house. She started "inspecting" the house, walking from room to room, suddenly not impaired at all. I was given a file containing her condition somehow, and it must have read like a detailed report, listing first her condition (maybe even in Latin) and then a description. All I remember is that it was about destruction of brain cells or something like that.
When reviewing the dream when coming awake it actually took me "forwarding" to this part to recognise it had been a "nightly experience". I really was wondering whether this had happened last week and not in this dream-like state. I realised that within this experience I was caught in "dream logic" again, but the other way round. I was weighing her plea for help against my real life commitments, when in hindsight this might have been only my interpretation of what she wanted. I was not lucid enough to recognise my situation and that this was not "real life". I think she actually wants that I participate in some kind of healing during some nights. When I expressed my (limited) agreement, that seemed to have triggered something else. Maybe then I saw the person "behind the condition".
Well, after I reviewed the experience I just affirmed to myself again "Yes, I want to help." and I'll see what happens. If I had been more lucid this whole experience might have been a lot different, but I guess my limited agreement was enough - expressing the willingness to help. I'm surely more willing to spend my dream time on helping someone out than taking on a real life commitment of that magnitude...
I had another dream experience earlier that night that seemed important, too, at that time, but I forgot.
Oliver
I saw a handicapped person approach the door. She was stuck in an electric wheel-chair similar to Stephen Hawking, she seemed to have a similar disabling condition. I told Mishell that I was answering the door. I got my wallet, because I thought this was about a fundraiser or something.
At first my impression of her was negative. But as we started talking that changed. Her appearance was that she was a redhead with middle-long hair, extremely wavy. She was slumped into her chair. She had some control-box or something that was really big, or was it a voice box? Maybe that.
I asked her what she wanted, and it surely was not what I expected. She told me that she was without people taking care of her for a while (I somehow remember that it would be two weeks), and if I would be willing to help her out. Like fill in the position of the person taking care of her, at least part of the time. That got me really confused.
Currently I have quite a lot of real life commitments, so I figured I had no time for this, basically. I was trying to figure out if I could do this without endangering my job or depriving my family life, and part of me did not want to do this at all, fearing the responsibility. I was wondering if I could do this at all.
I asked her why she was even asking me? How did that idea come up? And she told me it was about the way I took care of a loved one in the hospital some months ago (which took place in real life). That somehow stumped me.
I must have agreed in a way that I do not fully remember, I must have basically thought I could make room for two days. I did not want to let her go empty-handed, but in the dream I was still trying to weigh that against my real-life situation.
Now the thing happened that made clear that this was a dream. She rose out of her wheelchair and walked into the house. She started "inspecting" the house, walking from room to room, suddenly not impaired at all. I was given a file containing her condition somehow, and it must have read like a detailed report, listing first her condition (maybe even in Latin) and then a description. All I remember is that it was about destruction of brain cells or something like that.
When reviewing the dream when coming awake it actually took me "forwarding" to this part to recognise it had been a "nightly experience". I really was wondering whether this had happened last week and not in this dream-like state. I realised that within this experience I was caught in "dream logic" again, but the other way round. I was weighing her plea for help against my real life commitments, when in hindsight this might have been only my interpretation of what she wanted. I was not lucid enough to recognise my situation and that this was not "real life". I think she actually wants that I participate in some kind of healing during some nights. When I expressed my (limited) agreement, that seemed to have triggered something else. Maybe then I saw the person "behind the condition".
Well, after I reviewed the experience I just affirmed to myself again "Yes, I want to help." and I'll see what happens. If I had been more lucid this whole experience might have been a lot different, but I guess my limited agreement was enough - expressing the willingness to help. I'm surely more willing to spend my dream time on helping someone out than taking on a real life commitment of that magnitude...
I had another dream experience earlier that night that seemed important, too, at that time, but I forgot.
Oliver