I just knew...

[Mankycat]

Strange one this....

When I was about 7 or 8, this wonderful little person came into my life, he was my little cousin.

I held him in my arms, I looked at him, I LOVED him.

I knew, just knew then that what I was feeling, I would never feel for one of my own.

I am 28 now, and still dont have children, this feeling I had for my cousin has stayed with me, I still think that I wont have children, I have not actively avoided having children, and was with the same boyfriend for 4 years, without protection, I still have no children.

Since I was a little girl, I always wanted children, I think now perhaps that my path is elsewhere, I am able to spread positivity throughout my friends and have a very good way of inflicting positive mental attitude.

I would like to know however, what other people think of this situation.

I have not been tested to see if there is anything wrong in that department, as I find it easier to deal with thinking of my path as "elsewhere"

Recent tarot readings have confirmed that I am a lovely person, able to give light and sunshine to others and I find some comfort in that...

[ButterflyWoman]

My thoughts are that you don't have to have your OWN children in order to love and nurture children. There are many, many children in the world who need love and support and they don't get it from their parents... Perhaps you might be called to work in an area of support like that?

I don't know, nor am I making predictions, but it's a thought.

If you feel that your path lies elsewhere (i.e., with children other than your own biological ones) then I'd say follow that path and see where it leads. You can always re-assess at some later date if it seems appropriate.

[Caelrie]

I think that if you want children, you should go have children and not be concerned with sticking to some path set for you by either others or yourself before you had all the experiences you have now. Even if it turns out you can't conceive, there's adoption.

[Mankycat]

Hi there, and thank you for the input.

I feel that perhaps I focused slightly too much on the "path" side of things, maybe what I meant was that I am able to inspire and bring light to others, with or without children, perhaps mines or otherwise.

Maybe this story centres more around the feeling I had, that was almost a premonition to me, and that has remained true since then.

It may be worth mentioning that this cousin I talked of has since had his own child, and named me Godmother. So in a sense, I have his daughter.

I just felt that I would never be a paternal mother or feel the way I felt about him to one of my blood own.

[Mishell]

Sometimes your body will prevent you from doing something that it doesn't want to do.

I have read cases where couples were "trying" to have kids, but the husband was not producing sperm. After psychotherapy his fertility problem dissapeared.

Also, in the Holographic Universe, Micheal Talbot talks about young women of the Trobriand Islands who unconsciously prevent themselves from becoming pregnant before marriage because of their cultural beliefs.

And from personal experience, I never thought I was going to have kids. Never. But since I was about 30 or so I have met 2 children, while in meditation, who said they are waiting to be born to me. They were just waiting for the situation to be right.

If you want kids, it probably means part of your life plan for this incarnation was to have them. If you don't want kids, it will keep a lot of time free for other endevors, even if that is doing what you can to help other people's children if they need it.

[Mankycat]

I agree wholeheartedly with what you are saying, thank you!

[johnbrent]

I enjoy childrens company but I sure don't want to have one of my own.. but you, you should take out all of their advice. you can always adopt or something