vivian
29th December 2006, 08:57 PM
I promise not to belabor this, but let me give some quick background:
I frequently have Epic dreams, Lucid dreams, hear things while falling asleep, and sometimes experience False Awakenings. I am a mentally healthy, highly functional adult (who also understands the importance of relaxation). However, my dreams almost always involve either combat (and apparently I am a master of combat...in my dreams anyway), chases, or some other fear-generating element. To the point that these elements actually don't trigger that much fear in me anymore. I think I must be getting used to it somehow.
A brief disclaimer:
Please note that the following dream happened the day before I started reading Practical Psychic Self-Defense. My point in sharing that is to stress that the following imagery encountered in my dream was not influenced by my reading similar imagery in Robert Bruce's book. Rather, once I identified the similarities as well as the differences, I became both concerned and perplexed. Recently, I have been reading books like Robert Bruce's because I have been trying to understand the synchronicities (both positive and negative) that have started to escalate in my life.
The dream:
An old friend from high-school was walking with me in the woods, and we were chatting. Not a dear friend - Just someone I sat with in class and sometimes ate lunch with. When she stopped talking, I realized that she had lead us to a massive tree that appeared to have no top and no bottom. It was like a gigantic, living, organic column with branches that became the sky itself, and roots that became the earth on which we stood. She lead me up a short flight of stairs which ended at a massive, black hole in the middle of the tree, all the while acting as though this had been our agreed upon destination for some really fun event. The hole in the tree's trunk was large enough so that we could easily step through together, just by bowing our heads a little. When I looked at the hole, I immediately got the impression of rot and filth, and my dreaming mind-eye imagined ill, pale, "people" in pain but also wanting to inflict pain. Its negative energy was so strong that I could almost see a mist rising up from the pitch blackness of the hole. My "friend" then acted as though this was an entrance to some kind of amusing haunted house that we should go into. I actually considered it for a moment before telling her very calmly and firmly that there was absolutely no way I was going to enter that hole. She did not argue, rather, she lead me out of the woods and back into town, where I became distraught and felt incredibly ill. The reason for my distress was the fact that my vision had suddenly and radically altered. Everything I looked at (people, buildings, cars, the street, trees, animals...EVERYTHING) was composed of vivid green snakes mixed with vivid green vines. The snakes and vines were creating the shapes that I had been perceiving as people, homes, etc. In the dream, I thought that I must be going crazy. I was speaking with people who were completely composed of swirling, writhing, snakes and vines. I started hyperventilating until I spotted a vine/snake house which was shaped to look like a house I once knew. I pointed at it, and triumphantly declared to my "friend" that everything was ok - It was all just a hallucination. I laughed in relief, and explained to her that by standing next to the putrid hole in that tree, we had unintentionally intoxicated ourselves. That we had both misunderstood - That the "haunted house" she tried to convince me to enter into by stepping through the hole in that tree, was actually RIGHT HERE...In a sense. We had entered merely by standing too close to the black hole. The "friend" in this dream took the opportunity to convince me that I should go to a hospital right away, where they could "correct" this intoxicated condition. Ironically, once at the hospital, I was ushered into a secluded room roughly the same size as the festering hole in the tree had been. It was cold, and although not festering and overwhelmingly negative, it did feel sinister. The nurse left and closed the door. I became uneasy. The door opened just enough for me to see the nurses hand quietly snake through the cracked opening, and very, very, carefully turn off the light before quietly closing the door once more. I felt real fright building in my heart and I knew that I had made a very bad choice, but one I still didn't understand. I woke myself up, turned on a bed side lamp, and went back to sleep, this time with no recollection of further dreams.
My question:
I believe that the tree in my dream is a symbol for my own spiritual core. I believe that the festering hole is an infestation, if you will, of negative energies which have been growing since my early childhood. The problem that I have is this - How do I heal something of this size without sealing all that negative rot inside myself? I already know that I cannot (and should not) actually enter this wound. It is overwhelmingly repellent, and I get the distinct sense that whatever is in there WANTS me to enter. It is simply out of the question...So how do I "clean it out" without actually entering? Because even if I try imagery to purge whatever is in there, if I have not actually entered, I don't know exactly what I need to purge. I don't know...I guess I would just really like to hear any suggestions or advice that people might have.
Sorry for the length of the posting. I really did try to be succinct.
Best Wishes,
Vivian[/b]
I frequently have Epic dreams, Lucid dreams, hear things while falling asleep, and sometimes experience False Awakenings. I am a mentally healthy, highly functional adult (who also understands the importance of relaxation). However, my dreams almost always involve either combat (and apparently I am a master of combat...in my dreams anyway), chases, or some other fear-generating element. To the point that these elements actually don't trigger that much fear in me anymore. I think I must be getting used to it somehow.
A brief disclaimer:
Please note that the following dream happened the day before I started reading Practical Psychic Self-Defense. My point in sharing that is to stress that the following imagery encountered in my dream was not influenced by my reading similar imagery in Robert Bruce's book. Rather, once I identified the similarities as well as the differences, I became both concerned and perplexed. Recently, I have been reading books like Robert Bruce's because I have been trying to understand the synchronicities (both positive and negative) that have started to escalate in my life.
The dream:
An old friend from high-school was walking with me in the woods, and we were chatting. Not a dear friend - Just someone I sat with in class and sometimes ate lunch with. When she stopped talking, I realized that she had lead us to a massive tree that appeared to have no top and no bottom. It was like a gigantic, living, organic column with branches that became the sky itself, and roots that became the earth on which we stood. She lead me up a short flight of stairs which ended at a massive, black hole in the middle of the tree, all the while acting as though this had been our agreed upon destination for some really fun event. The hole in the tree's trunk was large enough so that we could easily step through together, just by bowing our heads a little. When I looked at the hole, I immediately got the impression of rot and filth, and my dreaming mind-eye imagined ill, pale, "people" in pain but also wanting to inflict pain. Its negative energy was so strong that I could almost see a mist rising up from the pitch blackness of the hole. My "friend" then acted as though this was an entrance to some kind of amusing haunted house that we should go into. I actually considered it for a moment before telling her very calmly and firmly that there was absolutely no way I was going to enter that hole. She did not argue, rather, she lead me out of the woods and back into town, where I became distraught and felt incredibly ill. The reason for my distress was the fact that my vision had suddenly and radically altered. Everything I looked at (people, buildings, cars, the street, trees, animals...EVERYTHING) was composed of vivid green snakes mixed with vivid green vines. The snakes and vines were creating the shapes that I had been perceiving as people, homes, etc. In the dream, I thought that I must be going crazy. I was speaking with people who were completely composed of swirling, writhing, snakes and vines. I started hyperventilating until I spotted a vine/snake house which was shaped to look like a house I once knew. I pointed at it, and triumphantly declared to my "friend" that everything was ok - It was all just a hallucination. I laughed in relief, and explained to her that by standing next to the putrid hole in that tree, we had unintentionally intoxicated ourselves. That we had both misunderstood - That the "haunted house" she tried to convince me to enter into by stepping through the hole in that tree, was actually RIGHT HERE...In a sense. We had entered merely by standing too close to the black hole. The "friend" in this dream took the opportunity to convince me that I should go to a hospital right away, where they could "correct" this intoxicated condition. Ironically, once at the hospital, I was ushered into a secluded room roughly the same size as the festering hole in the tree had been. It was cold, and although not festering and overwhelmingly negative, it did feel sinister. The nurse left and closed the door. I became uneasy. The door opened just enough for me to see the nurses hand quietly snake through the cracked opening, and very, very, carefully turn off the light before quietly closing the door once more. I felt real fright building in my heart and I knew that I had made a very bad choice, but one I still didn't understand. I woke myself up, turned on a bed side lamp, and went back to sleep, this time with no recollection of further dreams.
My question:
I believe that the tree in my dream is a symbol for my own spiritual core. I believe that the festering hole is an infestation, if you will, of negative energies which have been growing since my early childhood. The problem that I have is this - How do I heal something of this size without sealing all that negative rot inside myself? I already know that I cannot (and should not) actually enter this wound. It is overwhelmingly repellent, and I get the distinct sense that whatever is in there WANTS me to enter. It is simply out of the question...So how do I "clean it out" without actually entering? Because even if I try imagery to purge whatever is in there, if I have not actually entered, I don't know exactly what I need to purge. I don't know...I guess I would just really like to hear any suggestions or advice that people might have.
Sorry for the length of the posting. I really did try to be succinct.
Best Wishes,
Vivian[/b]