Love- Started by Alex

[CFTraveler]

Note on edit: This thread was started by Alex, and it was titled "Sometimes you're so close it's like you're not there". His post was deleted by him when he left the forum (he was an admin a long time ago), so the beginning of this has been lost. I hope he's still around and is happy, as the post, although the words are forgotten, was amazingly sublime. I don't remember the words, but I do remember the feelings. So the following is merely my reply and contribution to it.:


I remember when I realized I was in love for the first time. It was that moment when I knew that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him- that I couldn't imagine my life without him. That I wouldn't want to live my life without him. The good news is that it's who my husband is.
The funny thing is, that I thought I had felt love before-until then. That was the first real time I felt real love. And that's how it stayed until my son came along. Then I knew love again. And that's when I understood what Love is, how you can love more than one person with all of your being. Amazing, if you think of love of something you can quantify.
And yes, Alex, I don't think I can even imagine what it would be to love everybody like that. I would like to, though.

[sash]

It's great to hear stories like this, a while back I practiced this exact same thing that Alex speaks of, but unfortinantly I realized it was only one-way. I've found it's better not to do it again. The amount you open yourself up can lead to serious neg attack, I have noticed.

If you do have it both ways in a relationship I would imagine it would be a pretty awesome experience and way of life. However my experience relates to the idea of practicing this with everyone to achieve an even higher state. My thought is that you would get seriously trampled, manipulated and used.

Perhaps it's only a problem I have with practicing this, but if anyone else does, how would you suggest practicing such (on a global scale) without it ending up being detrimental?

[Beekeeper]

Think about how powerful this could be if we 'fall in love' with everyone. Not just one person, not just as a couple and our kids, but everyone on earth.

I've had this thought a lot lately too. I think learning to love one is the beginning of opening up to love many. Ideally it begins when you're a baby. Remember how intensely you loved your parents when you were little? (Maybe that intensity is still very much in evidence). Then your siblings and you're closest friends. When I'm having a wonderful time with my friends or comforting them through troubled times, I realise my feelings of love for them. This realisation was always there but it's more of a conscious thing now- a greater appreciation for the abundance of love in my life. It's different in quality to what you feel for your partner and kids but love nonetheless.


If you do have it both ways in a relationship I would imagine it would be a pretty awesome experience and way of life.
It is, Sash but sometimes you have to wait for the other person to play "catch-ups."

If you're hurting now, that will pass. We're here to love. Don't close yourself to it because it's a beautiful gift and you deserve it.

[sash]

Hey Beekeeper,

My thoughts are more co-ordinated by the action factor, as in when we act out of love. Feeling love towards others and opening to that is still quite powerful, and anyone can do it on the inside. However what Alex mentioned struck a cord with me that when we act in this particular loving way unless there is a strong trust there it poses a great risk.

There is a duality, acting 'differently, rather than the One Being that Alex mentioned, it's there now, and arises initially, but there is a reason.
Fear
Unfortinantly not many would be willing to accept this higher way of being, preferring to hold on to their 'difference', to close off, and actually attack you if you are open/loving towards them.

That's my general experience however, love can be quite a dangerous act to do to others in this world. I'm probably not contributing much to the 'theme' of this forum heh, so I'll shuttup now. :)

[Akashic_Librarian]

CFT your a GIRL :oops: I never new that lol

[CFTraveler]

I'm all girl, baby! :lol:

[Beekeeper]

Hey Sash,


There is a duality, acting 'differently, rather than the One Being that Alex mentioned, it's there now, and arises initially, but there is a reason.
Fear
Unfortinantly not many would be willing to accept this higher way of being, preferring to hold on to their 'difference', to close off, and actually attack you if you are open/loving towards them.

Yes, I see that we were talking very specifically and I digressed. Even so, I'd like to think you'll find someone who understands this kind of love and you will take another chance with them and be glad you did. :D

[sash]

I understand that Alex

I think on a global scale it is a bit trickier. In my experience you have to totally step out of your own layer of reality to flow with others in this way and to completely let go of judgement towards others, which is at times inconveinant and painful.

[Beekeeper]

Phew!! The whole sanity thing is a bit touch and go sometimes.

Now Palehorse, I've checked your blog so I know ..... taps nose

[Palehorse Redivivus]

Stunt double. :D

[LittleBee]

oh, LOVE... :-)
yes, TRUST is one of those aspects that can not fail (in any type of a relationship).
yes, RESPECT is fundamental too.
restaurants and parties? LOVE cannot be bought, it can only be mutually felt and SHARED.

i loved :-)
from the very begining, it was like recognizing each other from a past life.
the bond was immediate as the eye contact happened. Almost instantly it came to a point of not needing to ask the partner, but just feel/know his needs and share them, it was a complete understanding, truly and always respecting as naturally as breathing is.

but FEAR and not taking the risks can kill and ruin such a beautiful feeling towards the concerned person. No matter how long LOVE existed, it is never eternal, it changes (transforms) according to circumstances. Gladly, when people recognize this and fight, it becomes almost a fairytale with a happy end :-)

LIFE is made of choices and everything has a meaning and ways of hapenning. And sometimes sacrificing even LOVE for a greater cause (again could be love for a specific experience of greater aspects), also has it's meaning, unfortunately this is understood extremely late though.

Loosing faith in LOVE is like stopping to live.
LOVE is not only a feeling, it is actually a POWER SOURCE, we feed from it in so many different ways. WHILE IN LOVE we can write great music, books and poems, sing and dance, draw and mold. LOVE heals , truly heals and it is also true that when one love is lost it can be cured by another. Not that you didnt truly love in the previous relationship, but it is simply being perfected from experience to experience. It is not possible to say I loved one more than the other, NO, it is uncomparable and thus amazing to live it again!

Never fear being in love, if you fall, dont worry, you will get up again, as someone wrote here on the forum previously, we are all here to share our concerns, problems and fears and affections and respects for each other!
:-) XXX

[Veles]

an interesting discussion going on here =)
although it is impossible to fall in love with everyone, it would definitely turn the world upside down. Disagreements, confrontation, hatred, war and unavoidable. It is sad, but true that there is much more of the negative emotions than positive ones around us.

Love is a greatest feeling one may ever experience(in my opinion) but only if this feeling is mutual. If it's not - this feeling may be extremely painful and distructive. It is also very unpredictable. After some time, love may vanish (and that happens quite often) and i know quite a few marriages where the only bond remaming between the 2 halfs is children. In other cases, love may overflourish turning into an obsession which usually ends up as a sad story.

I would also like to say that i believe everyone of us has their second half, it's just the matter of finding that half. Doesn't matter if you're disliked by the majority of people, doesn't matter if you have plenty of bad habbits, if you are a geek, if you are fat, if you are whatever - there is always someone special who will find you perfect. Someone who will want to spend the eternity with you. And you will experience the same feelings towards this person. It's the matter of finding this person who will make you whole. Not many of us do find them though.

But beware... as much as love may inspire and invigorate you, it may burn and hollow you out.

[Diane]

I thank my children for letting me experience unconditional love.
To me, love also involves giving the other freedom, not forcing them to be what you want them to be. And then letting go when the time comes, not holding onto someone for selfish reasons, no matter how painful it may be.

[LittleBee]

To me, love also involves giving the other freedom, not forcing them to be what you want them to be. And then letting go when the time comes, not holding onto someone for selfish reasons, no matter how painful it may be.
Definitely! :-D

XXX

[LittleBee]

an interesting discussion going on here =)
although it is impossible to fall in love with everyone, it would definitely turn the world upside down. ...
...
I would also like to say that i believe everyone of us has their second half, it's just the matter of finding that half. Doesn't matter if you're disliked by the majority of people, doesn't matter if you have plenty of bad habbits, if you are a geek, if you are fat, if you are whatever - there is always someone special who will find you perfect. Someone who will want to spend the eternity with you. And you will experience the same feelings towards this person. It's the matter of finding this person who will make you whole. Not many of us do find them though.



Finding that person is the most difficult.
I wish all of us to be able to find this second-half during this life :-) and live it to the full keeping it and living it freely :-D

XXX

[Veles]

Yeah, i missed an important aspect of love... Giving - is not just something you are expected to do, but it is also one of your personal needs. Imagine, if you were loved but personally didn't love anyone, how would that feel? not that great... We all want to love just as much as we want to be loved. Same with "giving" we want to give something to the person you love just as much or even more than you want to be given.


And then letting go when the time comes, not holding onto someone for selfish reasons, no matter how painful it may be.

Of cause it would be painful to let go, but when you really love someone, you want them to be happy in their lives, with or without you.

LittleBee, thank you! :D i wish you and i wish you all the same.
Imagine if we all found our halfs? :) this world would be a brighter place...

[Tempestinateapot]

Alex said:

Think about how powerful this could be if we 'fall in love' with everyone. Not just one person, not just as a couple and our kids, but everyone on earth.

I think it would be great.This is the goal. The way out of incarnating and moving forward to the next level of existence.

I have a friend who has been following a spiritual teacher and receiving Deeksha. "Deeksha is a transfer of divine energy designed to bring about the state of Oneness." She is married and has children. Having experienced Oneness states, I gave her a warning. It's a beautiful thing. But, the flipside is that you need to be ready. To understand fully what that means. The state of Oneness is a state of loving everything equally. There is nothing in the human experience that can compare to it. And, that's where the problem lies.

When you love everything equally, it means that your lover, your child, your husband, your mother, anyone who is important in your life will be loved equally and with as much impact as you love a rock. The rock takes on an importance that is so grand and awe inspiring that it's hard to believe. For those who are seeking to live in the Now and experience Oneness on an ongoing basis, know what you are asking of yourself. If you are ready to let go of all human ties, loving all to the same degree, it can be a glorious thing. It also can bring about cutting ties to your family. When they realize that you love a stranger as much as you love them, it can hurt their egos and change relationships. I think this is what Jesus was talking about when he said that to follow him you had to hate your family.

For me, personally, forays into that Oneness are best left to occasional transcendental meditations. My family is still too important to me. I'm working towards loving everyone and living in Oneness. But, I've delayed givng myself completely over to the experience until my next experience after this lifetime. For now, I'm still into experiencing the human side of life...the good and the bad. :D

[Beekeeper]

So much of what we call "loving" is simply learnt behaviours through the thousands of stories modelled and presented to us in conversations and media and literature. Thus, many of us can't transcend romantic notions of what love between a couple should be. This is a problem when the experience doesn't measure up to the ideal. We also tend to feel that the expression of love between couples adheres to a universal pattern. Therefore, we dismiss love that we perceive as not fitting our ideals. Sometimes, too, we constrict others by trying to impose a pattern rather than opening ourselves to the experience as it is.

Now I've typed this, it occurs to me that it's true for other types of love too.

As for the "everyone has another half" idea, I think that that's just a romantic notion too. There are many potential lovers for any person, the other half is just the one you're with. If there's a specific soul mate, someone who will "find you perfect", I don't see why that person is necessarily the one you spend your life with. In fact, I believe that part of our spiritual evolution is to be around people who don't find us perfect (at least beyond initial infatuation :wink: ). Certainly, too, it's possible we choose to incarnate into some lives to experience living in celibacy.

[Veles]

Beekeeper, and just like that you killed it... :(
I was simply trying to inspire those of us here who have not yet found their second halfs..! :)

And you were saying "spiritual evolution is to be around people who don't find us perfect" - erm... agree in a way, but it sounds better then it actually works. We all are surrounded by people who don't find us perfect\ideal, but usually, you get a couple out of those people who fancy each other more then the rest, those closer to perfection.

*walks away mumbling: romantic notion - yeah, right.. to be around people who don't find us perfect - yeah, right... blah blah blah... *
:lol:

[Beekeeper]

I'm mean aren't I Veles? :evil: But you know, I prefer it when a lover is over the finding me perfect stage. That's just too much to live up to. If they know my faults (which is a subjective kind of thing if you think about it) and still love me, if I know theirs and still love them, then it's all good. And if there's a bit of unpleasantness because of that, then we've gotta grow up.

I wasn't trying to discourage anyone, truly. I think the thought that there's more than one possible person for you out there is a very heartening idea.

*Walks away mumbling... perfect other halves, yeah wait til the first time they fart in bed, steal the covers, blunt your razor, embarrass you in front of your friends...blah, blah, blah* :D

[Tempestinateapot]

You can tell who's been married in this thread, and who hasn't. :lol:

[Veles]

oh, yes, you are... avatars can be deceiving.
and still i'd stick to my illusive theory of perfect halfs (and perfect includes: no farting in bed or anywhere else, no blunting razors, or embarrassing me in front of my friends... i can get over the stollen covers - i've got a spare one :) )
I guess Astral plane(being an illusion), sounds like the best place to begin the search for my theoretically existent second half. I'll let you guys know once i've found it :)

[Tempestinateapot]

oh, yes, you are... avatars can be decieving. Actually, Beekeeper is one of the nicest, kindest people I've ever met on the internet. And, I have to say, I agree with everything she wrote, one thousand per cent. Having had 2 husbands, 3 children, and a lifetime of watching friends, family, and other's experiences of love tends to make one more realistic about what life and love are really about. It's about learning to love someone unconditionally...farts and all. If you think you will find someone who doesn't fart, you are living in a fantasy. It's a biological fact that no amount of wishing can wish away. Unfortunately. :D

[Veles]

Tempestinateapot... actually my last post was suppose to sound like a joke... :(

If you think you will find someone who doesn't fart, you are living in a fantasy
i realise that, and that's why i refered to the astral plane

We started off with such a glowing conversation of love... but look at this thread now...

[CFTraveler]

Now here is the chance for some Unconditional Love!
http://www.clicksmilies.com/s1106/liebe/love-smiley-008.gif

[Beekeeper]

Veles, I haven't taken any offence. :D

I love you! *plants a sloppy one on Vele's forehead*

I love Tempest *slobbers on her too*

And I love Cf *Chases her but she's too quick*

Long live love!!!

[Veles]

:D
i love you all too, guys... :)
what an emotional moment... that's exactly how topics about love are supposed to end )))
*hugs the first person he sees and and bursts out crying on their shoulder*

[Tempestinateapot]

Veles, you're a guy?!? Hehe, I thought you were a girl. Maybe you're so balanced you can be both. 8) CF and I are both girl/guys. *wipes Beekeeper's slobber off* EW!

[Veles]

haha )))
yes, it's just about the time to come out of the closet :)
i am a guy...
Don't know, maybe i can be both, but i'm quite happy with what i am now :lol:
What makes you think that i am "so balanced" though..? :roll:

P.S. i'm straight, so don't even go there... )))