buzzcock
2nd November 2014, 08:46 PM
Lots of my dreams are disturbing and unpleasant and have been for as long as I can remember, at least since my early 20s.
I've had some absolutely horrible ones about war and genocide type images, but most of them are ..not things that sound horrible when you say them, but they feel horrible. they have a strong feeling of me being alone, in a hostile or at least unwelcome environment, and being lost, in a bizzare world that just feels wrong, feels wrong and unnatural and a place where I shouldn't be. Feels kind of hollow and inreal.
Some of the themes that repeat are me looking round stores, markets or malls for a thing that I need but can't find, or it keeps moving and shifting round the shelves, me travelling on trains and buses in lonely, cold stations where I can never find the right train or I keep missing it, etc. Or me in a kind of holiday destination where I feel alone and lost, sitting in a cafe where I can't understand anyone or something.
Even the neutral dreams where nothing happens, they feel wrong, like a wrong place that shouldn't exist.
actually here is the good news. Over the last year I have been having less and less of those dreams and more ones where I feel warm and real and in company. In some of these dreams I was with old relatives who are no longer with me here and I felt very happy. And some were just, me with family, and they felt normal, not that "abandoned world" feeling my disliked ones have.
I'd like to know if anyone has any tips on improving this? I know making a more happy real life would help, but I feel like I'm trying my best at that.
I've had some absolutely horrible ones about war and genocide type images, but most of them are ..not things that sound horrible when you say them, but they feel horrible. they have a strong feeling of me being alone, in a hostile or at least unwelcome environment, and being lost, in a bizzare world that just feels wrong, feels wrong and unnatural and a place where I shouldn't be. Feels kind of hollow and inreal.
Some of the themes that repeat are me looking round stores, markets or malls for a thing that I need but can't find, or it keeps moving and shifting round the shelves, me travelling on trains and buses in lonely, cold stations where I can never find the right train or I keep missing it, etc. Or me in a kind of holiday destination where I feel alone and lost, sitting in a cafe where I can't understand anyone or something.
Even the neutral dreams where nothing happens, they feel wrong, like a wrong place that shouldn't exist.
actually here is the good news. Over the last year I have been having less and less of those dreams and more ones where I feel warm and real and in company. In some of these dreams I was with old relatives who are no longer with me here and I felt very happy. And some were just, me with family, and they felt normal, not that "abandoned world" feeling my disliked ones have.
I'd like to know if anyone has any tips on improving this? I know making a more happy real life would help, but I feel like I'm trying my best at that.