Empath or projecting my feelings onto others?

[Regza]

I am the kind of person who can not be around people for too long before I start to feel uncomfortable. It feels as if they start to 'bleed' into me. Now I am not sure if this is related to being an empath or me just projecting my own feelings or insecurities onto others. Sometimes a brief encounter with someone who I feel is having as bad day can really bring me down. I think I internalise what I pick up from them and assume they are upset with me in some way, which of course they might be but I never know so that is frustrating.

Oddly sometimes the opposite occurs and I can feel totally cut off from a person. When they are inferring meaning I can't seem to process it. I suppose it must be what autistic people must feel all the time.

I was in the company of a person a while ago and for some reason I got the feeling that she was looking down on me in some way. I have never got that from her before and there was nothing that she said or did to suggest that I was right but my gut is screaming at me! How do I know if this is just my own insecurities?

[IA56]

I am the kind of person who can not be around people for too long before I start to feel uncomfortable. It feels as if they start to 'bleed' into me. Now I am not sure if this is related to being an empath or me just projecting my own feelings or insecurities onto others. Sometimes a brief encounter with someone who I feel is having as bad day can really bring me down. I think I internalise what I pick up from them and assume they are upset with me in some way, which of course they might be but I never know so that is frustrating.

Oddly sometimes the opposite occurs and I can feel totally cut off from a person. When they are inferring meaning I can't seem to process it. I suppose it must be what autistic people must feel all the time.

I was in the company of a person a while ago and for some reason I got the feeling that she was looking down on me in some way. I have never got that from her before and there was nothing that she said or did to suggest that I was right but my gut is screaming at me! How do I know if this is just my own insecurities?

Hi Regza,
It is both and to be sure you have to start somewhere to become total sure...when it is what.
I started to ask people to see what they do answere me...mostly they did feel aqward and uneasy...so then
I changed to ask my best friend to train me how to ask for not upset people and through that I did learn
to trust my guts when I did get an answere and by being total honest and admit to myself when I was the one
who did react with my bad selfconfidence...so today I am rather sure when it has to do with me or if someone
does project...and there are so many layers to this so huh....it does take time to sort all out and I must say
I have not even come half way :-)
But I today know that I am not good in big crowds..it will make me confused and little in panic...to many things
to take in at the same time...so I do protect me more today and do say No to occations where I am not comfortable.
To show respect to myself and not be driving over myself anymore so to speak.
Start an investigation to sort your inner vs outer feelings and reactions.

Love
ia

[ButterflyWoman]

Work on your shielding and self-protection. In time, you get to where you can raise or lower your shields as you like. (And with certain people you trust and spend a lot of time with, you get to where you're "off guard" most or all of the time, of course.)

You may be projecting, and you may be picking up. Or their emotions may be stirring up your own (which is a kind of projection, I guess). The only way for an empath to ever be comfortable is to learn and constantly practice psychic sheilding, though. I'm convinced of this.

[CFTraveler]

Frankly, as an empath myself I am very aware of how others feel, so what you're telling me would indicate (IMO) that your problem is more of projection than empathy. I have no idea what you do for that.

[Lionheart]

Frankly, as an empath myself I am very aware of how others feel, so what you're telling me would indicate (IMO) that your problem is more of projection than empathy. I have no idea what you do for that.
I am a Merchant at various Renaissance Faires and State Fairs around the country. When I am finished my shows, I return back to our quiet, secluded Home in the country. I have been doing shows of this nature for over 20 years now and found out earlier in my life that I was a Empath as well. Being around thousands of people is not a good thing for a unprotected Empath. So, I needed to create some kind of shield. It got so bad before that MJ (my better half) had to kick me out of our stand to go "get rid of" whatever "personality trait" I had picked up on. The worst was anger.

Here's my technique. MJ and I create Handmade Dragon Sculptures that we vend at these shows. I base the color of our Dragons on the 4 Elements, then I added a spirit Dragon as well. So, my Shield is built on the Elements.

I stand facing the North and join my hands over my head as far as I can reach. I then state my purpose, which is to create my Sphere of protection. Then I visualize the Sun to my East, a flame behind me (South), water to the left of me (West) and a tree or flower/grass etc. in front of me that, signifying the North. I then will see a point/orb of light underneath me and over top of me. Starting with the top orb I connect a line down to the East, then the South, then West and lastly the to the North. I then do the same with the orb under me, connecting it to all the Elemental points.

Lastly I spread this entire Tetrahedral Shield out five feet from my being while mentally saying "I Welcome all good natured, like minded Humans and Entities inside of this and may they feel the love, healing and cleansing that create it. Lastly, (from my days of practicing Magick), I state that I do this with only Peace and Harmony in the multiverse and harm to none, so mote it be, so it is done.

This may seem like a lengthy process, but it really isn't. It takes maybe 3-5 minutes of my day. Not a lot to ask for. :)

[ButterflyWoman]

Being around thousands of people is not a good thing for a unprotected Empath.
Indeed!

I used to have a real "phobia" about crowds. I didn't understand until I was well into my thirties that it wasn't really a phobia, but a reaction to all the random energies and emotions and so on. Since I took up the practice of shielding, the problem has pretty much just faded away. I can go to concerts, fairs, shows, you name it. No problem. Took a while to perfect the shielding, but it was absolutely worth it.

Lionheart, your description was really interesting. Thank you for sharing it. :) If you feel inclined, you might like to copy and paste it to the Psychic Self Defence forum, and put it in the stickied thread on shielding. Or I can do it, if you don't want to but you don't mind sharing it there. ;)

[Lionheart]

Lionheart, your description was really interesting. Thank you for sharing it. :) If you feel inclined, you might like to copy and paste it to the Psychic Self Defence forum, and put it in the stickied thread on shielding. Or I can do it, if you don't want to but you don't mind sharing it there. ;)
Feel free to put it there if you wish. It would make my day to know that it helped somebody else! :)

[ButterflyWoman]

Feel free to put it there if you wish. It would make my day to know that it helped somebody else! :)
Done. :)

[Regza]

Thanks for the prompt replies. You've given me plenty of food for thought.

[eyeoneblack]

Hi Regza. You might have begun your post with:
I was in the company of a person a while ago and for some reason I got the feeling that she was looking down on me in some way. I have never got that from her before and there was nothing that she said or did to suggest that I was right but my gut is screaming at me! How do I know if this is just my own insecurities?

This feeling of 'being looked down upon' by a friend is a paranoia I well know. It may be less a question of empath/projection than a question of respect. You FEEL and feelings (intuitions) are your compass. The spirit revolts in the company of materialists and we are reminded too often of our anarchist strife to be who we are within and without, apart from the opinions of others. Because we walk a lonely road we are tempted to blame ourselves - which can pose for empathy. We are empathic because we ever look for a bird of our feather. That's the way empathy works. It is bilateral sense of 'you are I' and 'I am you'.

I think you have a very valid point. Empathy is always in part, projection.

[Terry]

If you are empathic you pick up on others feelings, sometimes thoughts and it is very easy to become attached or experience everything MORE than others who are not.

If someone feels or thinks a certain way about or towards you, and you are empathic then you KNOW how they feel about you. If you just think someone feels a certain way about you then that would be more paranoia. If you FEEL how they feel about you then you are empathic and there is no need for you to ask anyone, you FEEL it.

I met with several "gifted" people earlier last week and they shared similar experiences with me and things they do to detach or not take on others "stuff." Mainly it comes down to intention and being ok that you do not have to take on others "stuff", you mainly would do this quietly to yourself because saying it out loud in a group of people or out in public people will think you are nuts.

Just put out there that you understand and honor this person but you will NOT take on or accept their issues, emotions and whatever else.. boil it down to just "stuff" and make a silent declaration that you won't accept it, that it is theirs and has nothing to do with you.