pondini
31st May 2010, 07:59 PM
hi guys.
i'm new to all this kundalini stuff, but after reading a few threads here i have a few questions about an experience i had while attempting to astral project. i posted my account at another forum not too long ago, to get some input as to what happened, and i'll re-post it below only for clarity (i'm not out for attention, and i don't think i'm special in any way).
===
this is an odd experience that happened to me, but i'm not sure why. prior to the experience i had heard the word 'kundalini' and possibly the expression 'kundalini rising' but i had no idea what it was and i still know very little about it. since then, i've heard a few recounts from others explaining their experiences. i had also seen pictures of the chakras, but that is the entirety of my kundalini knowledge before the fact. honestly, i can't even be sure what happened, or why. that's why i'm posting this.
leading up to this event i had immersed myself into the plausibility of buddhist theory, the survival of consciousness after physical death, and out-of-body experience. it's when i chose to believe in these things strongly and spent much time in contemplation that the 'craziness' started :P
during this time i was attempting OBEs every night. though i didn't exactly follow the advice of the seasoned OBErs. usually i would try to clear my mind of all but one thought (as some buddhist mediators do) but on this particular night i tried to mix the technique of visualizing a location (an OBE catalyst) while keeping all other thoughts at bay. i figured if i visualized myself moving between three locations -my rooftop, under our corner light post, and the end of my culdesac- i could prevent all other thoughts from creeping in; basically i didn't know what the hell i was doing.
as i felt the verge of unwanted thoughts forming i would quicken the pace, traversing the three locations faster and faster. eventually i was zipping to-and-fro at a frantic speed, when i noticed my feet and calves felt REALLY GOOD! i tried to concentrate on my locations, but the euphoria in my calves was creeping to other leg muscles and i could no longer ignore it. then a thought occurred to me from something i had both heard from marilynne hughes and someone else. they explained how 'beings' had came into their rooms, and residing on each side of their prostrate body, began some sort of healing touch, starting at the feet and moving up their legs.
now please don't think i believe everything i read or hear... to the best of my knowledge i didn't 'buy' these stories when i heard them, but something very peculiar was happening and no other explanations were coming to mind so i was working under that assumption, although i did not feel there were any 'presences' in the room.
so, this sensation is slowly moving up my legs, with each new muscle being switched on fully (it wasn't rising inch by inch, it was more like muscle by muscle -the whole muscle at once). i dropped the chaotic visualizations and simply tried to observe the odd ecstasy in my legs. i was worried it could stop at any moment but it now seemed to be on auto-pilot, with absolutely no complaints from me!
i began to examine just why this felt so good, and it was clear that i could feel this energy within every atom of flesh and bone in my feet and calves. it wasn't like warm sun on my skin or a good massage that gets part of your muscles and deep tissue, it was through and through. even the souls of my feet were euphoric, and i believe if someone were to lightly drag a single finger up the arch of my foot it would have produced an audible response from me! next were my thigh muscles, this is where the intensity began to take on exponential increments. from the start the warm (to curiously-pleasant burning) sensations came in waves, with muted intervals -which enabled bearability and anticipation. if your entire body felt this way, all you'd want to do is roll around in the grass or hug someone, or perhaps some other activity:P
next up -one would assume- would be my Tourmaline/Muladhara chakra, but by the description of that chakra (the base chakra) it doesn't fit with what i experienced at that time; it had to have been the 'Swadhisthana' chakra that is related to the sex centers. at this point i was nolonger considering the 'helpful healing 'beings' theory'.
i won't go into this part too extensively, only providing a few details that might help to decipher the experience.
at the time of this episode i was ensconced in trying to follow the buddhist idea of denouncing vices or attachments. i am paralyzed from the chest down (from an auto accident in 1995) so choosing to reject the act of sex was a breeze, but rejecting the thoughts of it proved to be a challenge. at any rate, once the sensations reached my groin i felt an intense excitement that i hadn't felt since before my auto accident, if ever at all. besides the physical bliss i perceived in areas that i normally can not feel -due to my spinal injury- my mind was flooded with images of the female anatomy. oh, and i also felt androgynous... literally.
i thought i was being tested, much like the choices outlined and presented in 'the tibetan book of the dead'. i felt sure that if i submitted to my desires i would ruin whatever was happening, and it would stop. this went on for some time, but i wouldn't give in.
this sensation, which would repeatedly start at my feet and rise slowly to my groin, repeated at least 3-4 times before i decided that i had to submit in order to move on. so i MENTALLY gave in to my thoughts -in hope of seeing where this would lead to.
after a relatively short period of graphic imagery and thoughts (yes, i know how that sounds) the rising began to elevate to a spot in my lower abdomen, and whereas my earlier ecstatic sensation might be compared to known feelings, this higher sensation was not! after one or two waves reached my lower abdomen, growing in intensity each time, i felt sure that it might culminate into my 'bursting' in bliss... or some other pivotal event. it was at this time that i reconsidered the notion of those 'healing beings' that marilynn hughes spoke of, and for a moment i considered something might be healing my spinal injury and i began to cry. this is when the strength of the waves began to subside.
i can only imagine a full rising. it would be nothing short of Cosmic, for lack of a better term.
in the week following the experience i would only have to think of it and the warmth would zip up my legs without any effort. it felt great because i could basically fell my legs again after all these years, but for some reason i was fearful, in an unexplainable way, to try repeating the event. in retrospect i feel dejected about that.
===
ten days ago i encountered a much more diluted version of the same type of event while attempting AP. however, i didn't get the sensation in my legs at all, only my groin, naval, and heart.
then, last night it happened again while trying to AP. i was trying to use 'frank's' method of focusing my mind to my 3rd eye chakra, when i noticed the familiar sensation in my heart, naval, feet and legs. my naval and heart felt very warm and i felt as if i was short of breath. lately, i've had a few nights where i've woken up very breathless, and i thought i might have been having a heart attack because i could not catch my breath no matter how long i continue to breath heavily, and i felt the same way last night. i noticed my naval area felt very tense and my breaths felt inadequate while my chest also felt depressed. i only mention this because i recall reading a quote in a thread here about being 'breathless'. this event had no real sexual charge to it.
so my first questions are:
were any of these really a kundalini rising?
if so, why? (i didn't try, or ask for it.)
what is a FULL kundalini rising like?
i also have a comment about the 'perils' of a kundalini rising; honestly, i was upset while reading another thread here about how people can become mentally and physically unstable from this sort of thing. my view is that god doesn't make mistakes, and personally i would view it as an unfair blunder that a person who did not try for, or ask for the event, to be subsequently victimized because of it. i just don't see this as something that god would have overlooked.
thanks for any help.
i'm new to all this kundalini stuff, but after reading a few threads here i have a few questions about an experience i had while attempting to astral project. i posted my account at another forum not too long ago, to get some input as to what happened, and i'll re-post it below only for clarity (i'm not out for attention, and i don't think i'm special in any way).
===
this is an odd experience that happened to me, but i'm not sure why. prior to the experience i had heard the word 'kundalini' and possibly the expression 'kundalini rising' but i had no idea what it was and i still know very little about it. since then, i've heard a few recounts from others explaining their experiences. i had also seen pictures of the chakras, but that is the entirety of my kundalini knowledge before the fact. honestly, i can't even be sure what happened, or why. that's why i'm posting this.
leading up to this event i had immersed myself into the plausibility of buddhist theory, the survival of consciousness after physical death, and out-of-body experience. it's when i chose to believe in these things strongly and spent much time in contemplation that the 'craziness' started :P
during this time i was attempting OBEs every night. though i didn't exactly follow the advice of the seasoned OBErs. usually i would try to clear my mind of all but one thought (as some buddhist mediators do) but on this particular night i tried to mix the technique of visualizing a location (an OBE catalyst) while keeping all other thoughts at bay. i figured if i visualized myself moving between three locations -my rooftop, under our corner light post, and the end of my culdesac- i could prevent all other thoughts from creeping in; basically i didn't know what the hell i was doing.
as i felt the verge of unwanted thoughts forming i would quicken the pace, traversing the three locations faster and faster. eventually i was zipping to-and-fro at a frantic speed, when i noticed my feet and calves felt REALLY GOOD! i tried to concentrate on my locations, but the euphoria in my calves was creeping to other leg muscles and i could no longer ignore it. then a thought occurred to me from something i had both heard from marilynne hughes and someone else. they explained how 'beings' had came into their rooms, and residing on each side of their prostrate body, began some sort of healing touch, starting at the feet and moving up their legs.
now please don't think i believe everything i read or hear... to the best of my knowledge i didn't 'buy' these stories when i heard them, but something very peculiar was happening and no other explanations were coming to mind so i was working under that assumption, although i did not feel there were any 'presences' in the room.
so, this sensation is slowly moving up my legs, with each new muscle being switched on fully (it wasn't rising inch by inch, it was more like muscle by muscle -the whole muscle at once). i dropped the chaotic visualizations and simply tried to observe the odd ecstasy in my legs. i was worried it could stop at any moment but it now seemed to be on auto-pilot, with absolutely no complaints from me!
i began to examine just why this felt so good, and it was clear that i could feel this energy within every atom of flesh and bone in my feet and calves. it wasn't like warm sun on my skin or a good massage that gets part of your muscles and deep tissue, it was through and through. even the souls of my feet were euphoric, and i believe if someone were to lightly drag a single finger up the arch of my foot it would have produced an audible response from me! next were my thigh muscles, this is where the intensity began to take on exponential increments. from the start the warm (to curiously-pleasant burning) sensations came in waves, with muted intervals -which enabled bearability and anticipation. if your entire body felt this way, all you'd want to do is roll around in the grass or hug someone, or perhaps some other activity:P
next up -one would assume- would be my Tourmaline/Muladhara chakra, but by the description of that chakra (the base chakra) it doesn't fit with what i experienced at that time; it had to have been the 'Swadhisthana' chakra that is related to the sex centers. at this point i was nolonger considering the 'helpful healing 'beings' theory'.
i won't go into this part too extensively, only providing a few details that might help to decipher the experience.
at the time of this episode i was ensconced in trying to follow the buddhist idea of denouncing vices or attachments. i am paralyzed from the chest down (from an auto accident in 1995) so choosing to reject the act of sex was a breeze, but rejecting the thoughts of it proved to be a challenge. at any rate, once the sensations reached my groin i felt an intense excitement that i hadn't felt since before my auto accident, if ever at all. besides the physical bliss i perceived in areas that i normally can not feel -due to my spinal injury- my mind was flooded with images of the female anatomy. oh, and i also felt androgynous... literally.
i thought i was being tested, much like the choices outlined and presented in 'the tibetan book of the dead'. i felt sure that if i submitted to my desires i would ruin whatever was happening, and it would stop. this went on for some time, but i wouldn't give in.
this sensation, which would repeatedly start at my feet and rise slowly to my groin, repeated at least 3-4 times before i decided that i had to submit in order to move on. so i MENTALLY gave in to my thoughts -in hope of seeing where this would lead to.
after a relatively short period of graphic imagery and thoughts (yes, i know how that sounds) the rising began to elevate to a spot in my lower abdomen, and whereas my earlier ecstatic sensation might be compared to known feelings, this higher sensation was not! after one or two waves reached my lower abdomen, growing in intensity each time, i felt sure that it might culminate into my 'bursting' in bliss... or some other pivotal event. it was at this time that i reconsidered the notion of those 'healing beings' that marilynn hughes spoke of, and for a moment i considered something might be healing my spinal injury and i began to cry. this is when the strength of the waves began to subside.
i can only imagine a full rising. it would be nothing short of Cosmic, for lack of a better term.
in the week following the experience i would only have to think of it and the warmth would zip up my legs without any effort. it felt great because i could basically fell my legs again after all these years, but for some reason i was fearful, in an unexplainable way, to try repeating the event. in retrospect i feel dejected about that.
===
ten days ago i encountered a much more diluted version of the same type of event while attempting AP. however, i didn't get the sensation in my legs at all, only my groin, naval, and heart.
then, last night it happened again while trying to AP. i was trying to use 'frank's' method of focusing my mind to my 3rd eye chakra, when i noticed the familiar sensation in my heart, naval, feet and legs. my naval and heart felt very warm and i felt as if i was short of breath. lately, i've had a few nights where i've woken up very breathless, and i thought i might have been having a heart attack because i could not catch my breath no matter how long i continue to breath heavily, and i felt the same way last night. i noticed my naval area felt very tense and my breaths felt inadequate while my chest also felt depressed. i only mention this because i recall reading a quote in a thread here about being 'breathless'. this event had no real sexual charge to it.
so my first questions are:
were any of these really a kundalini rising?
if so, why? (i didn't try, or ask for it.)
what is a FULL kundalini rising like?
i also have a comment about the 'perils' of a kundalini rising; honestly, i was upset while reading another thread here about how people can become mentally and physically unstable from this sort of thing. my view is that god doesn't make mistakes, and personally i would view it as an unfair blunder that a person who did not try for, or ask for the event, to be subsequently victimized because of it. i just don't see this as something that god would have overlooked.
thanks for any help.